Have a heart on Flickr © Nina.Kalyn

I am EXHAUSTED. Turning onto my side in bed hurts like hell, lifting my neck from the pillow hurts like hell, trying to scrub my back in the shower or take off my shirt hurts like hell. It's like I've been run over by a truck.

But it's good. I like pain. Body pain is way better than brain pain, or heart pain.

And I've received a promotion! Which means more responsibility, more on my plate and time to grow up. It took me a really long time to get comfortable in the dance group, but now that I'm more involved, I feel a lot more ownership. How different it is from dance in JC, where everyday I looked forward to rehearsals at night, to supper at McDonald's and to performing in concerts or competing.

If you dig carefully, you'll realize my motives and priorities (obsessions) have always been the same. It makes you really vulnerable to be ruled by your emotions.