Age Is Nothing But A Number

I know I just turned 20 not so far back, but I feel like I'm already gearing up for the big 21. Just the same way I already mentally prepared myself for the number 20 while my birthday was months away. A little premature, I know.


It's just another year. Just a different figure on the cake. (This time, I had about 4 cakes for that many different birthday celebrations.)

It actually takes growing older to realize how much more you don't know about the world. I think I'm less sure and less cocky today than I was at, say, 15.

When I was younger, I generally thought that once you hit a certain age, you are required to know certain things. That there was no need to worry about certain issues now, because I'd know everything when the time came. Hah, so wrong. Poor naive child.

It reminds me of when I was little, and I thought signatures were something people received when they reached the age they were required to sign. I thought people went to some kind of school to learn how to sign, and that's where you get your own assigned signature. Cos' it totally didn't make sense to me that you can change your signature anytime. How could anyone verify anything that way? Or like when Dad lied to me (and I fell for it) that you need a licence to cycle a bicycle on the road. I'd mentioned that I wanted to cycle somewhere, and he laughed at me, asking whether I'd gotten my licence yet. I was so embarassed I shut up.

Things like banks, stock markets, other professions - I really draw a blank. Being a grown-up (or bordering on being one) doesn't entitle you to knowledge. I still don't know everything I thought I'd know about by now. And if I don't look, I may never figure it out too haha.

Now it's obvious to me that you just barrel through life and keep practising and repeating things til you master them. You're not going to do new things because you already know how, but because you're slightly more confident in your ability to handle them. I'm still essentially the same person today as I was a few years ago, and I guess I always will be.