I feel somewhat like a pampered kid. All I do is open my mouth, ask in a sing-song whiny voice for a favour and hope it gets done for me. Which is why I would like to have a car so I can at least do the one thing for myself.
In a way I resent having to ask people for help now, because I resent being dependent on others. But in reality, it is a difficult habit to kick. It's so easy to just say yes when someone offers their help, and so easy to just take advantage of someone's helpful nature.
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I feel kinda torn nowadays. Between this freedom and calm in me, and this stupid sentimentality. But it's okay, because I'm going to persevere in doing what I should have done years and years ago before this repetitive cycle of my life started. I'm going to have faith and wait. And not make rash decisions, because what will be will be. What won't be will never be. And if it must be known, there's no hatred in me, it's just an internal struggle to forgive and forget and to reconcile with the past.
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Yay, now that Athalie has passed her driving test on the first try, we can both use the P Plate and DRIVE!
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